someday i'll laugh

This girl is constantly doing things to make me crazy. It's great.

Today, she discovered she's really good at zippers and found that there was a fun bottle of Benadryl in the diaper bag. We keep a rather large bottle in there alongside the Epi Pen in case of swelling for nut emergencies. Where was I? Honestly, cleaning up after her breakfast hurricane.

I didn't look, so I'm not sure that the bottle boasted to be unbreakable, but it was plastic. Not sure if she dropped it - or banged it against something. Before I knew it, she was off, down the hall and into the bonus room area by our bedroom. I am still unaware. I hear a crash. Then a whine. Then scuffling. Another crash. A cry. Then, a scurrying up the half flight of stairs to my bedroom.

I walk down the hall thinking "Hmm, something is sticky on the floor. I need to get out the Clorox wipes and spot clean. (once I get back from checking on Ruby.)" There is an unfamiliar, sweet smell when I round the corner into our bedroom area. She is at the top of the stairs, a big red mark on her cheek, holding something. Something dripping. I recognize it as the Benadryl bottle. Sticky Benadryl dripping, dripping, running. Onto my floor. My beautiful Brazilian Cherry floor. Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!! Nnnnnnoooooooooooo!

There are five or six stairs separating us. I start toward her, and I slip and fall in a lake of Benadryl. I am not exaggerating. Lake Superior. Now that I know it's going to be ALL OVER the floor and stairs between the two of us, and being in bare feet and covered to my thigh in smelly, stickyness... I'm trying to get to her without stepping in more AND not getting what's already covered me and my feet on the clean spots in the floor. It is everwhere, between what I have spread and then I realize the couple of crashes I'd heard before were her slipping in it repeatedly.

When I finally navigate the puddle at the bottom of the stairs and get halfway up, seething in a stream of mumbled expletives, she sees the red glow in my eyes realizes she might be in trouble and turns and runs into my bedroom, dripping Benadryl the whole way. Little did I know she'd ALREADY been up there to spatter my entire room with sticky ick. ENTIRE. Room.

Normally I am calm in these Ruby situations, as I have survived the Cocoa Incident, a Lawry's incident, scribbles on computers, walls, tables with everything from pencil to Sharpie and numerous other situations --- but this time, I was GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. I picked her up and threw her into the shower and began to tackle the cleanup. Somehow, it was even under my bed. She wasn't even up there that long!

The bottle of Benadryl was completely empty. With a hole in the BOTTOM.

*sigh* Someday, I'll laugh about it.

How about a picture to remind me why I don't eBay her? She sure is cute.